Wednesday, February 25, 2009

...And We're Back!

In case you haven't heard, I got my data back thanks to a $15 part and a simple "chkdsk" command. So my book is back, and the bazillion hours I've spent on it have not been for naught.

Also, I have this to say for the Geek Squad: Although I appreciate your efforts, it really would have been considerate of you to GO FUCK YOURSELVES, YOU FUCKING WORTHLESS FUCKS!

That's all I have to say about that.

*It comes to my attention that "I'm on a Boat" starts playing every time someone loads this page. I can change that so it doesn't happen, if people want.

*On second thought, I don't care.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Crashed

Sometimes things fall apart. Or so I've been told, at any rate. I won't even begin to talk about my life being hard, because it's not. My life is a breeze. Bad things rarely happen. But when they do happen, they tend to cluster. Like last Friday night. My laptop crashed on Wednesday, to the point where it said there was no operating system. Against my better judgment, I took it to the Geek Squad at Best Buy to get it fixed. I requested the data back-up for $100 because, like I complete dolt, I hadn't backed up my book in awhile. Months, in fact. But, no biggie, I'd just pay my money and get my shit back. Right?

I should have known better. Friday I went to pick up my data. I've already had issues with getting data back from them in one piece, and I was ready for more shenigans this time. However, I was not ready for them to tell me they couldn't get my data, that it was corrupted.

My gut instinct was absolute panic. If I can't get my data back, I will have lost about 8 chapters worth of revisions, which equals about 100 pages, or about 80 hours worth of work. I will essentially be back at sqaure one on my second draft. It's my fault for not backing it up regularly, but for realz - I was ready to tear skulls from bodies when that guy said my data was corrupted. So I calmly left the store, got back in my car, and screamed until my throat was hoarse.

I basically sped out of the parking lot, and immediately realized that driving while enraged was a bad idea (especially considering how driving in general can be a bad idea for me). So I took a deep breath, slowed down, put my seat belt on, and started driving cautiously.....

And then promptly got into a car accident.

Not even my fault, if you can imagine that. Some chick totally pulled out in front of me and another car, trying to pull a left turn right in front of us. We both slammed on our brakes, but I did it a little too late. The only real damage was to my bumper, no injuries, so no big deal. But not a good experience. And not a good night

Anyway, the dust has cleared a bit. I may yet get my data back. My car will be fixed by the girl's insurance. I will someday have my revenge on Best Buy.

Moral of the story? If I had to pick one, I'd say that if something's important to you, make sure to keep it safe.

If I had to pick two, I'd add that you should never trust the fucking Geek Squad.

Monday, February 09, 2009

I Totally F***ed a Mermaid!

The "Dick in a Box" guys have done it again. Enjoy.


UPDATE - had to remove it. Couldn't hear Colbert.

Sunday, February 08, 2009

Party Til OLR Shuts Us Down

I miss show business. It took me watching a high school show choir competition to realize it, but I really miss the lights and the stage and the crowds. I miss costumes and characters and making audiences laugh. I'm sick of being the 14-year old lawyer who doesn't talk much and works with the funny Mexican guy. I wanna be a star again.

So here's what I propose: for all of you who miss it too, join me. We'll do Law Revue: the Professional Years. We find a stage somewhere, grab a few props, and take aim at the practice of law. Instead of professors and students we'll mock judges and other attorneys. Your most clueless judge? Toast. Your most loathed DA? Toast. And let's not forget, the greatest source of legal comedy, clients. Glorious, glorious clients. We change the names to protect the incredibly guilty and incredibly dickish alike, and then we roll.

Sure, we'll be disbarred if anybody actually comes to watch us. But that's bound to happen anyway, right? Why not go down in a blaze of comic glory? Think of it as the "swallowing nitroglycerine" approach to picking up women. If we're going to fail, why not fail to the extreme?

No seriously, this could totally work. Who's with me?