It has come to my attention that hating everyone in the world is not the best way to go through life. Yet I find it hard to quell my overwhelming enmity toward the populace at large when so many people can’t even manage to conduct themselves with even the most basic common decency. The most recent target of my animosity is the idiots who feel compelled to pick their nose and wipe the product on the wall in front of the urinals in the 2nd floor bathroom of the Law Building. Seriously, what in the fuck is wrong with you guys? I mean, I understand that sometimes there are certain elements in the nasal passage that need to be removed. But putting them on display for all to see in the bathroom while we’re trying to conduct our business? We’re all adults here, and as inhabitants of the law building, one would assume we’ve moved far beyond this type of display of juvenility. Clearly I am wrong, judging by the proud display of the green and slimy.
Then there are the people at my apartment building who feel the need to scratch words into the elevator doors. This happens so often that the doors get repainted at least once a month. Just once I’d like to be able to ride the elevator to or from my apartment without being greeted by some illegible cursing or the name of the latest troglodyte that learned how to spell. For instance, the doors were just repainted this week, and they went about a day intact, before I found the words “Kill Traci” in giant letters accompanying me on my ride down this morning. Now, even assuming for the moment that Traci deserves such a death sentence, is this the appropriate forum to discuss it? Is there any point to doing that, other than the momentary immortalization of your idiotic inner monologue?
Who else can we look to here, the ones that are really pushing me toward the edge…. How about the people who can’t hold a door for anyone, even those directly behind them with their arms full? How about the ones who randomly smash in the mirrors or windows of someone’s car? How about the ones that create computer viruses, just for the sake of fucking up other people’s property? How about Big Chief?
Please, just try to use some common decency. That’s all I’m asking.
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5 comments:
See, katherine, that's what happens when you don't have a precision fluid-aiming device such as a funnel or penis.
You can't argue with that. And sometimes it's not a bad idea to use both.
People, Katherine? People?
I hereby move to put funnels in all facilities.
Poor Traci needs a venue that is more fair than the court of public elevators.
You know, I heard that rumor about Andy too, but I didn't believe it. Then I went out and asked around the 1L girls, and they all verified it.
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